Smoke Break

-
Standing behind a closed metal door
New job
New people
Familiar feeling and same old ache
She asks me
What happened
What happened?
What
Happened?
I
Lost
Him
I show her the band
The word flashing in dim neon
She asks me
Why
Why I had it on
Because it's the only thing I have left of him
I tell her
Did you love him
More than anything
More than
Anything
Anything that I ever have
I tell her
I tried to move on
Throwing myself forward
Trying to forget
But
I can't
I can't
I can't
I hate the smell of cigarettes I say
With my own smoke slipping from my lips
Nicotine filled vapor billowing into the late night air
A tear slides quietly
I wipe it quickly to keep her from seeing
What I have become
Broken
Alone
She sighs
Tells me she knows how I feel
I just smile and nod
Knowing that there's no way she could really know
What it was like still being in love
With someone who is disgusted by your very presence

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